Lasagna

I made lasagna for supper today and was wishing I could make it for Renee. She always liked me to make lasagna when she came "home".

Parched Land

My heart longs for a place

I've never seen

I know only the promises

You've whispered to me

Of a milk and honey land

And a well of living water

Don't lead me to another oasis

I'm tired of going in circles

This thirsty ground is crying out

these cracked pieces want

To be made whole

Come flood this desert soul

This is part of a poem Renee wrote in Jan. '05.

Yesterday was two years since the day Renee found out that she had relapsed. Oh, that was such a dark day for her. When we went to Vancouver a month ago, I had such a powerful flashback as we approached the baggage area at the airport, of meeting Renee there two years ago today after receiving that horrible phone call.

I am trying to keep my focus on the One who is the Living Water, to bring refreshment to my weary soul. The Lord is my Shepherd. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you that you were there for Renee as she walked though this dark valley.

And thank you for the hope of seeing you face to face, our precious Savior. I must always desire your presence in my life more that anything.

Engraved in the Palm of His Hands

One of the devotionals I read this morning was on the verse "See, I have engraved you on the palm of my hands." Isaiah 49:16 The writer says,"Why would God engrave your image onto the palms of his hands? Because ... he thinks about you all the time. He watches over you." He sees it all ... our cares and concerns, our weaknesses and wants, our tendencies and traumas ... and he loves us as we are. What matters is that he has set his love on us and we are never off his mind, out of his sight, or away from his loving care.

A month ago when we were in Vancouver, I was feeling so overwhelmed with sadness. I was missing Renee so much. As I was looking at the mountains, I was reminded of Psalm 121 and that my help comes from the Lord. I know it is okay to feel sad. It is not healthy to keep pushing those feelings away. But we need to be reminded again and again where to go for strength and comfort to go on.

Ring the bells that still can ring. Forget your perfect offering. There is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in. -Leonard Cohen

Living in the Land of the Shadow

None of us will come out of here alive unless Christ will return before our time comes to leave this earth. We are pilgrims on a journey to a better land. We can sing and shout for joy knowing there is a much, much better place being prepared for those that love the Lord. Sometimes even although our hearts are heavy with grief and tears are streaming down our faces or just suppressed beneath the surface we can still find that the joy of the Lord is our strength.