So many questions and so many tears.
“‘For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the LORD.’” Isaiah 55:8 (NIV)
When the phone rang in the middle of the night, I couldn’t help but wonder if one of my greatest fears had become a reality. It was the police. They were calling to tell us my 21-year-old son had fallen asleep at the wheel while driving home from a friend’s house.
Mitch was only four months old when his biological father died. Since then, I’ve have had two fears; that my son’s life would be greatly affected by the loss of his father and that he would die young, too.
When Mitch was four, one of those fears was relieved. God brought Pat into our lives, filling the role of both father and husband.
Like any good father, Pat is a wonderful man who supports his family in the good times and bad. This night things were bad. When Pat arrived at the scene, he found our son’s demolished car hugging the mangled 50 foot guardrail that had kept him from crossing the highway into oncoming traffic.
Mitch, however, didn’t suffer a single scratch, bruise, or broken bone — not one. His dad was stunned, but the police officer was astonished even more. In fact, the officer had this to say to our son.
“If I were you, I wouldn’t go home and go to bed. I’d go to the nearest church and thank God for saving your life because He obviously has a purpose for it.” It was as if God was speaking directly through the officer. Pat drove Mitch home in silence. The police officer had said it all. What more could he add?
Sunday afternoon, we drove to the junkyard to retrieve Mitch’s personal belongings from the car. The first thing I noticed about the damaged vehicle was the date, 9-9, painted in large orange numbers across the windshield of the mangled car.
That’s when it hit me. Mitch’s accident occurred on the anniversary of his biological father’s death. Stranger still, they were exactly the same age. As my eyes fixed on the date, I realized it was a message from God — an undeniable clear sign from above. Mitch was in the hands of God.
That truth pierced my mind and Satan’s lie was broken. I was no longer afraid of losing my son to death.
God has a different plan for Mitch than he had for his dad. I always knew that truth intellectually but, that day in the junkyard, it became a reality. How could I doubt God anymore when my son walked away from a near death experience on the anniversary of his father’s death? I couldn’t.
Regardless of my doubts and fears, God has a plan. Usually it doesn’t look like mine. This experience reminded me that my thoughts are not the same as God’s thoughts. He sees the bigger picture. He knows His plans. It also taught me to fall on my knees and relinquish all my fears to God while trusting in His good and perfect will for my children.
You see, the only power and control you and I have over any fearful thought is to place it in the hands of God. Doing so keeps us from being taunted day and night by “what if?” Instead, we can rest in the assurance that God’s thoughts, ways and plans are more marvelous than anything we can imagine ourselves.
Dear Lord, help me to see my circumstances through your eyes and not mine. Teach me that your ways are good and marvelous and they can be trusted. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.